:: Youth & Eternity ::
We'll keep the red light on for you.
[2004-09-08 @ 4:32 p.m.]

I. Love. School.

Well, maybe not "love", but it gives me something new to do. I do have a few problems with it. And they are as follows:

1. My first bell. It's only problematic in the encumberous amounts of homework assignments.

2. My second bell, AP Government. Only in that I am the only Republican, and that there are only 12 people in my class, and in my "group" are two guys: one talks too much, one talks too little, so I have a feeling I'll be the one holding it together.

2. My other second bell, Orchestra. Only because of the teacher. And the 30 extra students this year. And the playing tests every other week. And the fact that we're playing Superman songs while the "good group" plays Spiderman and WonderWoman. (Don't let the juvenile songs throw you off, my orchestra is among the country's best.)

3. My third bell. French. Only because it's broken in fourths by lunch, three-fourths at the beginning, one-fourth at the end. It makes for a frustrating French bell.

3. My lunch. I get to eat in a special "Senior Dining Room" with the one other senior that's my friend in the entire lunch bell. All of my other friends have other bells. There are four bells. For 3000 students. And the other seniors, even the ones I sit with, I really dislike.

3. The 3000 other students.

4.My fourth bell. This is the thing that outweighs the rest of the problems. I am the only senior in my entire Honours Chemistry class. Please, do recall the fact that I took Physics a year early, and had to take Chemistry a year late. That is no fault of mine, only of the school and the lack of room and funding. Because of that lack of room and funding, I am stuck looking very inept in a class of juniors. Chemistry may be easier, but I actually prefer Physics now.

4 and a half. The bus ride. I'm a senior! No one that lives close enough loves me enough to give me a ride, and I don't want nor need a car. Everybody I know who lives close either has too many people to drive already, or he and/or she has forgotten me. And I have to ride the bus. I may as well not be a senior. I don't even get out at the senior bell two minutes early because I'm in a class fulla juniors. 'Tisn't fair, I'm tellin' yah.

So, those are my first days of school, documented in this diary like I want to document the mosquito currently biting me into oblivion. Sorry to sound so pessimistic, but I dislike highschoolers. I don't like them. I don't like to be one. I want to go where people act more grown-up.

For instance, and yes, I'm almost done, some of those kids I don't like at lunch find it necessary to constantly curse. Please tell me that I am not solitary in the belief that cursing brings down the validity of any argument, and undermines existing intelligence! Basically, people who have to drop the f-bomb every two seconds sound stupid because they've no other words to say. And the girls at lunch, girls my own age, talking about how much they look forward to marrying their boyfriends! Why? Why do they find it necessary to surrender all self-progress in favour of support of another? Let's face it, even in today's society, women have to cheer on their men. Women don't ever get cheered on. I think that if I were to ever marry, it would be long after I've made my own foot-hold in the world of money-making. Because, for heaven's sake, what happens if it goes wrong fifteen years from now for those girls? They have nothing left. They're stupid. STUPID. As selfish and solipsist as it sounds, to get married fresh from highschool, or even fresh from college is stupid. At least to my nature it would be a very stupid thing. I can live just fine all on my own. I don't think I'd like being married at all, having to spend every day with the same person. I like change far too much, I depend on change more than I'll ever depend on stability. I find "stability", especially the fallacious stability of marriage, to even be grotesque. I couldn't stand it if I were to fall into that trap.

And I still HATE Chemistry class. Good thing college is almost here!

PS. (yes, I'm psing you! feel lucky!) The title came from MXC. Because it's funny.

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one thousand embraces

SILENCE, TRAITOR! - 2006-05-10
Irish History - 2006-05-02
Goodbye Bio! - 2006-05-01
DANCE, WATER! DANCE! - 2006-04-26
Gaaaaaah. - 2006-04-24

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